Download the How to Sleep Well Even When Work Is Stressful Guide: thesleepdetective.com/workstress


If work follows you to bed at night, this one's for you.


Most people assume the fix is a better bedtime routine. But if you're lying awake with your brain still running through everything that happened today and everything waiting for you tomorrow, the problem started long before you turned out the lights.


In this week's episode I walk you through exactly what I do, and what I tell my clients, to stop work stress from sabotaging sleep.


Here's some of what we cover:

  • The mindset shift that stops the after-hours rumination loop (this one changed things for me personally)
  • Why telling yourself you're overwhelmed is making your sleep worse and what to say instead
  • Simple workday habits that lower your cortisol before you even get to bedtime
  • What to do on the nights you worked late and you're wired when you get home


These are real, specific changes, not generic wind-down advice you've already heard.


00:00 Work Stress Insomnia

01:05 Mind Body Approach

01:56 Set Mental Boundaries

04:16 Stop Rumination Loop

05:23 Calming Self Talk

06:50 Workday Focus Hacks

09:19 Deep Work Scheduling

11:07 Busy Season Wind Down

12:02 Calendar Time Blocking

14:20 Evening Cutoffs No Screens

16:07 Free Guide Next Steps


Episode Transcript


[00:00:00] If you're lying awake with work running through your head, emails you haven't written, things you didn't get done, what's waiting for you tomorrow? Your job isn't just exhausting you during the day, it's actively keeping you awake at night Every time a stressful thought comes in, your body releases cortisol, and cortisol at night is exactly what stops you from sleeping.


I've been helping people with chronic sleep issues for seven years, and work stress is a common thing I see driving bad sleep. I've also had to figure this out for myself, running a business, raising a young son with a brain that doesn't want to shut off at night.


In this episode, I'm going to walk you through exactly what I do and what I recommend to my clients to stop work stress from sabotaging sleep. These are real specific changes, not generic wind-down advice. We're going to cover mindset first because nothing else works without it. Then I'll give you practical habits for your workday, and [00:01:00] then what to do specifically if you're in a busy season or working late.


Even though, as you may know, I mainly talk about physical imbalances in the body that affect sleep, I also help my clients with any kind of stress and mental part of not sleeping as well. So I very much believe in a body and mind approach and addressing both of those things at the same time. Because we can do everything for your gut and your hormones and your neurotransmitters, and if you're still super stressed, especially about work, it's not necessarily going to be enough because that stress is breaking the body down at the same time that we're trying to build it up and get it back in balance.


So addressing both of these things at the same time is going to be the fastest and most effective way to sleep well long-term, not just temporarily, but for the rest of your life


So when I started my business, my son was just [00:02:00] over one years old. And I had never started a business before; I had always worked for someone else. And so I was thinking about work constantly, even when I wasn't working.


And luckily, one of my first business coaches really talked about this, about setting boundaries in your mind, about not thinking about work when you aren't working.


So when you're at work, you're thinking about work. When you're at home or, you know, when I'm with my son and my family, I'm focusing on them, and that way I can give my work 100% when I'm there and my family 100% when I'm there, and I'm not mixing the two.


And when I started my business, I was also waiting tables at night so that I could work on my business during the day but still have enough money to pay the bills. And so I would get home at about 10:30 at night, and I would feel super wired because I had been around bright lights, you know, I was [00:03:00] busy running around on my feet.


And so when I first started this, I would sit down in front of the TV to decompress after work. And, you know, I really loved this time because I got to watch whatever I wanted, and my husband and son were asleep, and so it was kind of my time. But I realized that I was sleeping horribly.


It would get to be 11:30 and 12:00, and I would still feel wired and, but I would go to bed because I was also exhausted, and then I would just toss and turn and have the worst sleep.


And so I finally decided to stop. I'm like, "This isn't working. Even though I'm loving this TV time, this is not what's working."


So I decided that I was going to try meditating instead. So I would come home, I would put my legs up the wall, and It wasn't even meditating. I would just lie there and just my thoughts would be so busy, and then as the minutes ticked on, they would just slow down. And once I felt like things were slowing [00:04:00] down and I could actually think about nothing, then that would be the end of it.


Then I would read my book, and then I would go to bed, and I would be sleepy 30 minutes later, and I would go to bed and sleep great. So that made the biggest difference for me


so as you may have already experienced, thinking about work when you're not working is exhausting, and you don't actually solve anything, right? I know for me, I was just ruminating about the things, but I never came to any conclusion because I would constantly be interrupted or I would tell myself to stop thinking about it.


So I really set this boundary, like I mentioned, of not thinking about work outside of work time.


Now, if sometimes I would have a great idea, I've actually been on a mountain bike ride and, like, just this whole blog post or podcast episode comes into my head. So I do stop, and I put that down on the notes section in my phone, and then I let it go again.


So sometimes we do have great ideas when we aren't working, when we're relaxing, and I think it's [00:05:00] fine to capture those.


But if you're just ruminating about something, then it's being aware of that and then just letting it go. And the more you practice it, the easier it gets. I've gotten to where I don't usually work on the weekends, and I don't think about work on the weekends. If it comes to my mind, I just let it go. And so I'm not spending all weekend ruminating. I am enjoying my weekend.


Now, as far as mindset goes, what you say to yourself actually creates how you feel. And so coaches have helped me with this, and I have seen this for myself as well. If you are thinking, "I'm overwhelmed," or, "I have so much to do," all of that is creating stress and just reinforcing that thought.


And I know for me, when I'm thinking I'm overwhelmed or I have so much to do, I, like, feel this panicky feeling, and then I feel like I start rushing, and then I start making mistakes or, um, you know, not doing things well. And so it makes my work [00:06:00] even less productive and, and less high quality.


So I've started telling myself, "I have plenty of time,"


or, "I know that I, I always have time." And so, you know, this needs to be something that resonates for you. So if I have plenty of time does not seem true and that seems ridiculous, then that's not gonna help. So for me, yeah, sometimes it's I know I'll always have time, or if I have to work a little later in the afternoon, then I'll do that.


Telling myself that helps me calm down, it helps me slow down, it helps me not feel that anxious feeling that makes things rushed, and so that makes a huge difference.


And then I'll tell you this calendar hack that I have in just a few minutes when we get into the hacks.


So first of all, during your workday, some of the hacks I really recommend are having work apps either [00:07:00] buried or removed on your phone. You know, instead of having your work email on your phone, if you can, then don't have it on your phone, and make email something that you only check when you are in front of your computer during work time. I definitely recommend s- silencing all notifications, 'cause every time something comes through, we get distracted, and then we have to find our place again, and so that really ruins productivity.


You can do this on your phone and on your desktop so that those notifications aren't coming in.


I also recommend doing your important work first before you open email or any kind of messages. So for me, I'll have, say, a certain number of things I wanna get done each day, and I like to do those things first before I check my email, before I even check my messages in the client app.


And that way, when it's time for me to check email and check my client messages, I'm fully 100% [00:08:00] able to focus on that and not thinking in the back of my head of all these other things that I really want to get done that day.


I also try and set specific times to check email. So instead of just checking throughout the day, just, maybe you check it midday and then before the end of the day, and that way...


'Cause I know for me, when I'm just checking all day, I, like, look at something, and then I go back to what I was doing. And so it's just this distraction that I don't actually, finish. , I don't respond to the email or do anything with the email, so it's kind of pointless to even see it and get distracted and then have to go back to what I was doing


I really have this strict rule about not checking email after work hours. So for me, that usually means 5:00. I do not check my work email after that because one stressful message can ruin your entire night. And the evening and the night of sleep. If you have the luxury of not being expected [00:09:00] to check email and messages and you can do that, then I highly recommend this. You are missing nothing, especially if you're not planning on working. If I check an email and there's something stressful, I'm still not gonna respond to it until the next day. But instead of being able to enjoy my evening, I'm gonna be ruminating about it.


Now, I also recommend setting times for deep work without distractions. So this, of course, is gonna help us be more productive, but it's also going to help with sleep because again, when we're trying to multitask and go from one thing to the other, that is stressful. The body's releasing cortisol. So for me, Mondays and Fridays are my deep work time, and I don't usually have any calls those days.


And then Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursdays are more packed with calls, and that's where I'm more focusing on my clients.


It doesn't have to be all day if that doesn't work for you. I'm a morning person, so I do my best work in the morning. So I could also block off from [00:10:00] nine to noon or nine to eleven and have that time for a specific project and turn off all the other notifications, put my phone on airplane mode and just be able to focus on that and get that done.


This is also a little random, but I recommend eating breakfast before you have coffee. So when you have coffee on an empty stomach, I mean, first of all, your body's going to release cortisol. That's partly what caffeine does. But it can really m-make you jittery and anxious if you don't have any food, especially some protein to pair that with.


So again, we want our days to be calm and not stressful because when we're stressed all day and constantly thinking and running around, it's really hard to wind down at night unless we take some time to wind down and calm our nervous system. So the calmer we can stay during the day, the better. I know that there are gonna be crazy days and, you know, that's just how it is.


But, eating [00:11:00] breakfast, stabilizing blood sugar for the day, especially before coffee, can just help us feel calmer throughout the day.


Now, there may be some times where you have to work late or you're super busy with work, and this is what I recommend during these times. And some of these could be just a good daily habit to get into as well.


But journaling before you leave work. So that means if you, you know, have certain things that you know that you want to do the next day, is get that out of your head, write it down on paper, and then you're not ruminating about it in the evening or trying to remember what you have to do the next day in the evening or the middle of the night. And that can help your brain stop spinning.


I think it can also really help to take two to five minutes just to do some deep breathing at the end of your workday. So especially if you've been super busy and feeling overwhelmed, then taking that time to calm your nervous system can set that tone for the [00:12:00] evening and help you be able to sleep better at night .


Now, one of the hacks I love, especially when I'm feeling overwhelmed, is putting everything on my calendar.


So I use Google Calendar online, and I'm kind of time blocking into where I have certain tasks on there and how long I think it will take. So if I am, you know, planning this podcast episode, I have an hour blocked for that time on my calendar. If I'm reviewing lab results for a client, then I have that hour blocked off on my calendar.


And I'm not super strict, so things can move around. But why I recommend doing this is then I can see that there is enough time for all the things I wanna get done. It helps me feel less overwhelmed when I'm like, "Oh, everything I need to get done, there's time for in the calendar."


And if you find there's not time in the calendar, then at least you know that, and then you can delete things or move things around on your calendar to where there is [00:13:00] enough time.


You know, that's when you might wanna prioritize. Like I'm about to go on vacation to the beach next week, so I know next Friday I'm not gonna get my usual Friday tasks done, all of them. Right? I'm probably gonna be doing some last-minute things to make sure that I am prepared to be on vacation for the week.


So I'm going to actually put that in my calendar of like check in with all my clients, and I'm going to delete other things that I don't have time for. And that way I know that I always have time. So when I'm telling myself I have plenty of time, it's not a lie, because I can see that I do have plenty of time.


And I recommend especially during busy times, adding time for yourself in your calendar. So whether that's a lunch break where you can go and take a walk or eat lunch at your desk without working, um, whether it's taking time to exercise or go for a walk after work, [00:14:00] putting that breathwork in the calendar, this is when it's so important to take care of ourselves during these times, and that's usually what gets last priority during these times.


But I actually think it needs to get first priority. And I know this is hard, but again, if you put it in the calendar, you can see that you have time for this.


I also really try not to work past 8:00 PM. That's kind of my cutoff. I rarely work in the evening anymore anyway. But for me, I know if I work past 8:00 PM and I'm on screens later than that, I am not gonna sleep well.


So having some kind of cutoff for yourself can really help. If you know if you work till 11:00 that you're not gonna sleep well, then it's probably not worth it, honestly. If you stopped at 10:00 instead and got a better night's sleep, you'd be more productive the next day, and So you actually gain more in the long run with that instead of trying to stay up late and then not sleep [00:15:00] well.


And I also recommend if you're working late or getting home late for something super busy, is that's the time to not get on the TV or your computer or your phone. It can really help to have no screens during that time, especially if you've been on screens all day. So you heard about my TV trap that I got into when I was waitressing late at night and, um, how that affected me.


And so, you know, if you know your mind is spinning, I know it's so tempting to want to sit in front of the TV and just zone out, but that's just adding more stimulation to your already stimulated mind. So if you want to do what I did and lie down with your legs up the wall and kind of meditate or do some deep breathing, even just a few minutes of breathing, um, and I like to make the exhales longer than the inhale, so I'll usually inhale for a count of four and exhale for a count of eight, [00:16:00] and that really helps to calm the nervous system as well. So doing that can make a huge difference in the quality of your sleep that night


Now, if you want all of these recommendations in one place, I put together a free guide called How to Sleep Even When Work is Stressful. Everything that I just went over is laid out so you can actually use it, and you can grab that at the link in the description


Your nervous system doesn't distinguish between a work email and a physical threat. Literally every reactive moment is causing the body to release cortisol. It's causing more stress, which is going to affect your sleep. So I recommend picking at least one of these things that I just talked about and starting something tonight.


And then if you've addressed stress as much as you can and you're still not sleeping, that means that something deeper is going on in your body. And that's what the functional lab testing is for that I use in my Complete Sleep Solution program. So I'll not only help you with the [00:17:00] stress, especially from work or life in general, but we'll find the stress that is happening in your body that you probably don't even know is there and help you fix those things and get your body back in balance so you can sleep well long term.


The first step to get started is to book a consultation with me, which you can find at the link in the description as well


And if you want to know the three steps I use with all of my clients to fix their sleep, you want to watch the next video

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