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If you've tried everything and you still can't sleep, this episode is going to reframe everything.


After working with hundreds of clients, I've mapped out the five phases everyone goes through on the way to sleeping well again. And I want to share them with you, because most people quit right before things turn around.


In this episode you'll learn:


  • Why you're stuck and what finally breaks the cycle
  • What the process of actually getting better looks like, including the part nobody warns you about
  • Why a bad night doesn't mean you're back to square one
  • The story of a 70-year-old client who went from hospitalized the night before his first call with me to sleeping solidly through the night and running for mayor


00:00 Insomnia Breaking Point

00:52 Phase One Feeling Stuck

02:29 Billā€™s Story and Hope

04:54 Phase Two Find the Cause

07:02 Phase Three The Rollercoaster

09:10 Phase Four Big Improvements

10:34 Phase Five Sleep Freedom

11:43 Next Steps Work With Me


Episode Transcript


[00:00:00] If you've tried everything and you still can't sleep, you know the feeling. You're exhausted, you're frustrated 'cause nothing is working. You spent money on supplements, programs, doctors, and you still don't have an answer. And in the back of your mind, you're starting to wonder if this is just your life now.


I'm Martha Lewis, sleep consultant and functional health coach i've spent seven years helping clients fix chronic sleep issues using functional lab testing to find the root cause.


And I've worked with hundreds of clients who were exactly where you are right now


What I've learned is there are five distinct phases every one of my clients goes through on the way to sleeping well again. And in this episode, I'm going to walk you through all five so you know exactly where you are, what's coming next, and what it actually takes to get to the other side.


So phase one is probably where you are right now if you're watching or listening to this. [00:01:00] You're stuck. You're frustrated. You don't know why you can't sleep. You're exhausted, withdrawing from life, right? Like I know when I wasn't sleeping well, I was canceling plans. I didn't want to do the activities that I love, like mountain biking and skiing as much.


And I was spending a lot of money on things that weren't working and trying lots of things that weren't working. Like I stopped eating chocolate in the evening just in case that was causing it. And I stopped watching TV before bed even though I had done that for years before. I was spending my days researching why I couldn't sleep and trying to figure out what to do about it.


And, you know, one of the worst parts was really just feeling helpless and out of control. Like, all I wanted to do was sleep in the middle of the night and I couldn't


So this is a trap that's easy to get into and where I was for two years is trying the same kinds of things but expecting different results. [00:02:00] That's the definition of insanity, right? It's doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.


Now, I'm sure you're trying lots of different things and that's, you know, it's just part of the process.


And what got me to finally figure out my sleep is I learned about functional lab testing and thought this is something different and this makes so much sense. There's gotta be something going on in my body that's causing this even though every doctor said that I was fine because my blood work was normal


So my client, who I'll call Bill, was the same way. He was 70 years old. He's playing pickleball six days a week. He's riding motorcycles. He's going skiing. He's visiting his grandkids. But he was waking after only two hours every night and couldn't get back to sleep, so he was only getting four or six hours. He had a ton of brain fog. He didn't have a lot of energy. He was withdrawing socially because he was exhausted, and he had [00:03:00] gut issues as well.


He was taking Ambien every night. Then he started taking ZzzQuil and 10 milligrams of melatonin all at the same time. And he had been doing this for six to seven years


His son had seen me for sleep and so that's how he knew about me, so he decided to sign up for the program even though he was skeptical I could help.


The night before his consultation with me, he was hospitalized for a small intestinal blockage. So he did not think that I would be able to help with that. But I explained to him how the gut and sleep are connected and that I thought I would be able to help with that.


So in this phase is where a lot of people stay stuck and not because the fix doesn't exist, but because it's not obvious, right? Like the medical system isn't helping, CBTI isn't helping, therapy isn't helping, all of these things aren't helping.


But I want you to know that there is a way [00:04:00] out of this and I think that it is the way out of it. I see not being able to sleep as a sign that your body is out of balance and when we find what's out of balance and fix those things, then you can sleep normally again. And so that's what I do in my Complete Sleep Solution program.


So the next four phases are what happens when my clients are going through the program. And I want to tell you about this so you know what to expect because they don't sign up and miraculously start sleeping better the next night. I wish it worked that way and if I had a way to do that, I would totally do that.


But unfortunately, it is a process. It takes a time for the body to get back in balance. And if you think about it, it's probably been out of balance for years if not decades. So it's pretty amazing that in six months or less your body can get back in balance enough to be able to sleep well again


So phase two is that you finally find out why you [00:05:00] aren't sleeping this is when you shift from guessing or not having no idea why you can't sleep, if you're like I was, to seeing from lab data exactly what is affecting your sleep.


These functional lab tests that I do look at gut health, at hormones, at cortisol, at neurotransmitters, at toxins, at all the different things that, that could be affecting your sleep, because it's different for everyone which things are affecting sleep.


And unfortunately, conventional medicine misses these. You know, if you go to your doctor, they're going to tell you to do CBT-I or follow sleep hygiene. If those things don't work, they're going to prescribe a pill and send you off to do a sleep study, which is really just looking for sleep apnea.


So for Bill, his labs completely explained why he wasn't sleeping. His neurotransmitters, serotonin, dopamine, GABA, were all totally depleted. His hormones were also [00:06:00] depleted. He had two gut pathogens, C. difficile and H. pylori, and he had a lot of bacterial overgrowth as well. He also showed some signs of mold toxicity, and his liver detox was impaired.


So all of those different things were affecting his sleep in various ways, and they were all connected to each other.


In this phase is when people really start to feel relieved because finally they have answers. So even if they aren't necessarily sleeping better right away, they can see the light at the end of the tunnel because they know that we're going to work on all these things and that all these things are explaining why they can't sleep


Bill had some early wins right away. So digestive enzymes really helped him feel better immediately. He made some small dietary changes that made a difference, and we started working on his anxiety about sleep.


So in this phase is when you realize you're not alone, you don't have to figure this out on [00:07:00] your own anymore, and you actually have a plan


So the next phase is when sleep gets better, but then it dips, but then better again, and this is completely normal. I always explain that this rollercoaster, as I call it, is part of the process. So it's normal for sleep to be up and down, but we want it to be trending up over time. So there's still gonna be dips, but then the improvements just keep getting better and better.


And I will say, too, some people start improving in other ways before their sleep improves, so maybe they have more energy or they feel more rested with the amount of sleep that they are getting.


And then other people, their sleep improves first, and then it takes longer for energy and other things to catch up. So it's just different for everyone, and it's impossible for me to predict how someone's journey's gonna be. But I just want to express that it is normal for it to be a rollercoaster, for it to be up and down, but we want [00:08:00] to see it get more consistent over time.


So for Bill, he was traveling a lot and still not sleeping as soundly as he wanted to.


He even got back on the ZzzQuil at one point because he was waking up at three AM. So things had improved, right, where he instead of waking up two hours later, he was getting like five hours, so that was a huge improvement. But he obviously wanted to be getting more.


So this is the phase that most people, if you weren't working with someone who was guiding you through this, you would think that things weren't working, right? Because even if things were getting a little better, you're still focused on, "Oh, but then I had this bad night." And so this is why it's so important to have the support and have someone guiding you through this process. And so for Bill, you know, he just kept focusing on that he knew what was causing this, and he was working on the things that would help him get better. So I really encourage my clients to focus on [00:09:00] the trends and not the dip.


And Bill noticed that his gut was calming down and things were moving in the right direction, even though there were ups and downs.


Now during phase four is when sleep usually dramatically improves, but some bad nights still happen. But the goal is that they get farther and fewer in between. We're gonna have an occasional bad night every now and then. It happens to everyone, even the best sleepers. My husband will sometimes say, "Oh, I've, you know, been awake since 3:00," and he considers himself a great sleeper. So it happens to everyone. And, you know, again, this is why it can help to be in this program because I'm reminding you that these still happen. But if you were just on your own and you had a bad night, it's easy to spiral, right? And then that bad night turns into days and weeks and months of insomnia again.


Instead of, you know, me being able to remind you, "Hey, these things happen. Let's brush it off," and we work on [00:10:00] this kind of mindset work throughout the program as well so that one bad night is no big deal.


So for Bill, by this point, and this is three to four months into the program, he's sleeping seven to eight hours every night. His stomach had improved significantly. He was feeling a lot better. He could eat salad again without it hurting his stomach.


And he was still using ZQuil at home, but none of the other medication, no melatonin, and he was becoming less dependent on it.


He just wanted to wait to fully finish all the supplements before getting off the ZQuil


So phase five is toward the end of working together when you're sleeping well 95% of the time. Again, those bad nights are gonna happen every now and then. They happen to everyone. But for the most part, people are sleeping well. They're waking up rested. They have more energy. They're off medication.


They're feeling great. And this happened for Bill as well, where he got off the [00:11:00] ZzzQuil completely. He wasn't taking Ambien. He wasn't getting up in the night anymore. He said he had twice the energy, and he just felt confident and in control of his sleep again, which for me is the most powerful thing as well.


Even though he was retired, he had decided to run for mayor because he had the energy and the bandwidth to do that now that he got his sleep back. So his own words, he said, "Doing very well, sleeping solidly through the entire night, waking up refreshed. Stomach is almost 100% better. Life is good."


This is why I do what I do, because I love seeing my clients feeling and sleeping so much better.


So if you're in phase one right now where you're struggling, you don't know what's causing this, you're trying lots of things, then that's exactly where Bill was as well. So the next step is to find out why, is to find out what's going on.


And that's what I do in my Complete Sleep Solution [00:12:00] program is run functional lab tests so we can find the underlying health issues or imbalances in your body that are affecting your sleep while we also work on your mindset so that when less than ideal nights happen, it's just not a big deal anymore.


And then I give you a full plan to follow and support you as you follow that plan so you are consistently sleeping well in six months or less and feeling so much better and getting your life back. The first step is to book a consultation with me, which you can find in the description.


And if you want to know about my three-step method, you can watch the next video, The Three-Step Sleep Fix for Adults Over 40

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